2003-04-11 - 1:29 p.m.

I shouldn't have called yesterday. I shouldn't have. oh well no regrets, right? Now that this has happened I'm not sure how to feel. In some ways I feel better and in some ways I feel much as I did before. I don't know if I've gained a friend or not. I don't want to over think this. It is what it is. NOthing more nothing less. NO expections Elise no expections. I'll just keep telling myself that and hopefully I'll start to believe it.

I know I can't trust him, he proved that. I know it. So I'm just going to expect nothing. Remember he made promises before that he didn't keep.

promises of the same thing remember.

But it's so goddamned hard.

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